Emotional independence is the ability of owning your moods and designing yourself without outside interference change it otherwise. It is not same thing as living alone as some people think. Rather it is about making responsible choices that foster personal development. Imagine a life of self worth, self esteem, etc. When you find happiness with yourself, and are contented with who you are(with or without a relationship), you know you have finally gotten there. But if your happiness and moods, depends on others, you know you are far from being emotionally independent. Why give people to power to decide whether to be happy or not? Emotional independence may seem complex, it is achievable
5 Ways to gain Emotional Independence.
- Find your passion and do something about it every day: When you find yourself doing something you are passionate about, the feeling of excitement and satisfaction is inevitable. It makes you feel worthy of life and you also feel like you are contributing to humanity. Finding your passion and being consistent with it, or doing something related to it every day keeps you in high spirit. It keeps you in a joy moment and at peace with yourself. If you can transfer that feeling of inner peace and satisfaction in to your relationship, you won’t have to depend on the things others do to find your peace. Being consistent at this will bring you emotional independence.
- Take responsibility for your happiness: Happiness is a personal decision. You certainly have no control over the things that come to your mind but you can decide which of them to ponder upon. The things you ponder upon will determine your mood. Make it a habit to entertain pleasant thoughts and not otherwise. When you decide to entertain the sweet memories, you will find yourself often in an inward happy party. Such a mindset is like a thick wall which cannot easily be broken into. Anyone with an attitude contrary to your inner experience will either join your party or stay out.
- Quit mind games: Don’t be an emotional blackmailer. Don’t be the kind of person whose partner cannot communicate with for fear of putting you to tears etc , because if they can’t talk with you for fear of blame, they will definitely talk to someone else for a chance of comfort. Such an action is not any different from a pity party and that sucks. In the same way don’t entertain anyone with such character because they will still your joy.
- Don’t be a people pleaser: Do stuff because they maintain your high sprit and keep you motivated, and not because they win people’s approval. For example, take a weightlose plan because you want to wear something you desire, and not because it will keep anyone around you. Apply this attitude to every other area of your life.
- Don’t take their bait. You can always identify when someone is trying to drag you into a fight or an argument etc. You should be bold enough to choose what to respond to. If something isn’t going to maintain your high spirit, don’t respond to it.
- Don’t be too predictable: Don’t always do the obvious or react in the obvious manner. Someone trying to engage you into a fight and you jump at it etc. It doesn’t pay off to be predictable because people will take you for granted. If they know how you will react, they will do the obvious and the chain continuous. Be in charge of you. Be emotionally independent.
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