How to keep Calm when all hope is lost

It is only a person who has been pushed to the wall that would understand what it means to lose hope. Sometimes after all the efforts we have put in trying to make things work or trying to change people’s impressions of us, nothing positive comes out of it and we feel like we are losing. It could be trying to impress your boss to win over a promotion and just when you thought all was working right, the position was given to someone else. It could also be an addiction or an inner crisis you are struggling with and all your efforts to lead a better and healthier life is unproductive. Other times it is that business you have invested so much time and money into yet things aren’t working as planned and you feel like shutting down.

Losing hope is always a bitter experience and it always seems unfair to us. It is during such times that we tempted to question our very own existence as we brood in our pain. It makes us feel useless and we can’t help but find who to blame for the circumstances. There have been many times when I have found myself in such situation but because I didn’t die after all, I knew there was something in it for me. Though certain situations may break us and make us feel awful about life, certain actions can help improve upon the situation or renew our hope.

“Food for thought” that will help you move on:

  • Every day is a second chance: All hope is not lost until you are dead. Life could be full of disappointments or frustrations but if you didn’t die from the heart aches, there is hope. It doesn’t matter where the frustrations put you, be it in a hospital bed, on a wheel chair, on the streets, etc. If you are still up and breathing, understand that all hope is not lost. Every day is an opportunity to make things better.  It is up to you to evaluate the situation at hand and consider whether to start afresh or patch things and continue from where you stop. The challenge here is that we are often tempted to path things when what we really need is a fresh start.  Don’t spend so much time wallowing in your pain and frustrations of yesterday because you will fail to see the opportunities today brings. It is normal to cry and feel terrible but give each day a chance to make things better.
  • Life is what it is: Life could be anything but imperfect. There is a time for everything. A time to cry and a time to laugh.  A time to plant and a time to harvest etc.  That is to say everything we face, either closes a phase or opens a new one. We are pilgrims and when on a pilgrimage no one stands on the spot.  As you journey on, you keep growing from strength to strength. You outgrow your childish ways and take on the apron of maturity. What you couldn’t handle yesterday seems like a childish prang to you today Thus consider the issues you face as the apron of maturity, and allow it to bring out the best version of you.   If your business is not working, don’t give up on it rather learn how to stand out among competitors. If it’s a disappointment in a relationship, don’t lock up yourself in hate and anger rather learn how to love sincerely and true love will surly find you.  Everything happens for a reason. You might see your problems as the world against you, but it is not so. If what you experience has no message in it for you, God will not let it happen.
  • Avoid negative competition:  One reason why we lose hope is because we feel like we are doing what others did and recorded successes but it doesn’t seem to work for us. In other words, we are following the strategies of people we consider as mentors or friends etc. This is a huge error because what works for A will not necessarily work for B. We all have unique paths in life and thus should have unique strategies to walking our path successfully. It is good to hear the success stories of people because that should serve as motivation for us to walk our path in confidence, and not a yard stick for measuring our strength. Avoid copying others and trying hard to wear the shoes of other people you might not fit in.  Don’t dance to the rhythm of their music; rather find your own music and dance to its rhythm. We are wonderfully made! There is no beauty in competition because it will only make you see the beautiful things in another person’s life while you ignore the peace in yours. We all have something to be thankful for so when things don’t turnout right, don’t be in the habit of sinking because you may suffocate before the waves can get you to the sure.
  • Walk by faith and not by sight: This is about trusting God to bring you out of that crazy situation irrespective of what your mind might perceive. For example, sales might be slow and you are in debt. You simply choose to believe that somehow you will pay your debts though you can’t see how that is possible. God doesn’t need time to work. He just needs our faith to do it. When all is dark and gloomy and you can’t look past the pain of yesterday or worse still, you are living in the shadows of yesterday, turn to God.  Find your bible and it will find something for you. An easy way of doing this is, especially to first time users, is by “googling” some bible passages about the situation you are facing. You will be surprised at what you will find.  Then open up your bible and read through.  There is something for everyone in the bible. Remember “…before you were formed in your mother’s womb, I knew you”. Turn then to Him with that which burdens you in confidence, irrespective of the size of that confidence. Sometimes all it takes is to ask God for a lead. There is a solution to every problem we face but how willing are we to follow the lead to that solution?


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  1. Avoid negative competition. This is a very valuable suggestion. And “walk in/with Faith” is another. Faith is required in large quantities when we loose hope.

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