There is so much power in influence that goes beyond peer pressure. The influence we have on each other as humans is way more than just authority. It remains a fact that our thoughts and perceptions of life influence who we become but do you also know that your thoughts and perceptions of those you socialize and live with influences the tone of your relationship with them?
Do you sometimes wonder why some people are so sweet to others yet so rude to another? Have you ever wondered why a particular relation, friend or colleague seems to get along with everyone else in your circle but you? You could be quiet all you want but each time you want to say a word they fight you as though you were attacking them. The answers to this lies in our perceptions about these people.
The way we see and think of others greatly affects their behaviors towards us. When you see the good in people, the good in them surfaces in response to that good and positive thought you have about them. But when you see only their short comings, the negatives in them will also come forth. For example, you might know someone who won’t listen to nothing you say even if what you were saying was right. But should another person say that same thing, even using your exact words, they will take it for gospel. As earlier mentioned, the reason for this lies in your perception of them which is more often on the negative side such as thoughts of them which define them as dump or not smart etc. That thought a lone makes them see everything you say as a challenge and are always ready to fight you back.
There are various reasons why people think negative of others.
Preconceived Ideas: You might have grown up knowing a particular person as evil because of the picture they had painted of that person and each time you meet them or even think of them, something negative comes to mind. Such preconceived ideas only makes matters worse and you might get to see much more evil in that person that others did. Get to know people on a one on basis before you jump to conclusions.
Past mistakes: People make errors in life but unfortunately others never walk pass that error. Don’t make it a habit of reminding them of that wrong because you will only be adding gas to an already burning fire. Choose to see the good in people and you will be surprised at how much goodness was living inside of them, wishing to be noticed.
How to enforce positive influence in your immediate circles
Choose to see the good in people especially those you meet in your daily lives. You might think there is no good thing in a person based on past behavior or something you heard but the truth is if a person is 100% evil, God would have destroyed him/her already. If is someone is still walking the face of this earth, it means there is hope for repentance. The reason why we are still living despite our sins is because God sees the good in us and continuously gives us a chance to make it better which is why everyday, people realize their errors and turn a new leaf. Don’t deny people the chance to be a better version of themselves by your negative thoughts of them. You might find yourself with people who continuously step on your toes just to confirm your thoughts.
Find that one thing that you like or used to like about the people you despise and each time you are to meet them, reflect on that goodness before meeting them. You will see how much influence you can have on them by a single positive thought. If you wonder why a child will listen to an uncle better than his dad, it is because the uncle sees some goodness in him which the dad never takes notice of.
When next you are in a fight with that relation, friend or colleague whom you consider annoying/awkward/weird etc, ask yourself this honest question. What were you thinking about them before the meeting? You can influence your relationship with everyone by the things you perceive of them. This is not about the people you meet randomly but about those in your immediate circle. Let the good thoughts of them in your mind be stronger than the negative ones and they will respond positively. For example, try telling a child that is not living up to your expectations how proud you are of him or her for that one thing they did right, and you will see them trying to dance to the right tune. Also try telling a spouse or a parent who neglects their duties how much you appreciate their efforts and you will see the changes that will bring about.
We all have influence on one another. The more we see the weaknesses of those we interact with, the more weaknesses they will have to show us. Sometimes consciously but most times unconsciously. The reverse is true.
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