What’s your Cope Mechanism?

Mag1-2020Have you ever been with friends or hanging out with a social circle and people start telling you how much weight you have added, or how “different” you look?

In almost every social circle, there is always that someone who is kin on others’ lives. They are the first to tell you how much weight you have added, the bumps on your face, how uneven your makeup looks etc.  For every one positive complement they give you, they have over 10 negatives ones to spoil it.

When people tell you, you have added weight, you can tell who is actually concerned about your health, and who is just out there to make you feel terrible about yourself. To the later, give them no ear.

One thing people should learn to do is to find themselves. If you know who you are, you will not be bothered about those complements that are meant to bring you down.

Most times those who keep telling you how bad you look, are suffering from insecurities and you are the outlet they have. Talking you down, makes them feel better about themselves. So when people tell you such things, tell them to take a second look at the mirror. I like to tell them, the problem is not my size, it is probably their eyes that grew bigger.

But then, if what they say really bothers you because you think there is some truth in it, I have a little secret for you… Find yourself and everything else will be put in place. Get to understand what you find comfort in and address the problems that activate that cope mechanism. There is something that makes you not eat right, or sleep right, etc. In most cases, it is not just cravings, but something deeper. It is often an emotional problem and just as some people turn to alcohol for relief, others turn to food and much other stuff. For instance  if you find yourself snacking much or eating more when you are sad or worried, it is very likely that a prolong stress or challenges, will cause you to add weight.

So as you can see, the problem is not the inability to maintain the gym schedule, or the diet plan, but rather the inability to face those challenges. The eating or poor eating is more of a response to the underlying problem. As such, a way out is to find yourself and there is no better way of doing that than seeking the face of your Maker, God Almighty.

Life is a lot easier when we know who we are!

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